The Only Karaoke Lesson You Need

  • Know the words. The TV is for suckers. 
And here's a couple more for the road. 
  • If you wanna be fun but can't handle the high notes, try a Pretenders song. 
  • If you're down with the highs, go with Justin Timberlake and don't stop til they turn the lights on. No more Michael Jackson for a while. He's retired. 
  • You can dance if you want to. 
  • If you see a pretty girl, share the mic with her when it comes time to scream. You score fun points for being generous and for being 80s. 
  • Every once in a while, throw a punch or two. You're still tough so don't let people forget it, ya know? Damn right.
  • Keep it street. You start singing too well and your Medal of Honor turns into a Medal of Yawner.
  • Fun Karaoke is about digging up a gem that no one expected. Two back-to-back slows or a 1950s cheese-out or a misogynistic hip hop number keep things crispy. 
  • Pretty Fly for a White Guy is 10 years old; everything is an oldie now so go nuts. 
  • The two most important syllables in the Umbrella Song are not EL-LA. They're BE-ER.